


A Story to Tell

by Polly_Phemus (orphan_account)



Series: Dom Down the Hall [12]
Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - BDSM, Anal Fingering, Ass Play, Butt Plugs, Courtship, M/M, Masturbation, Submission
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-29
Updated: 2017-06-29
Packaged: 2018-11-19 09:46:52
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,488
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11310822
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/Polly_Phemus
Summary: Jared reconnects with friends and colleagues; Jensen rearranges furniture in exchange for Story Time.  Jared recounts tales of adolescent sexual exploration and adult loneliness.Jared's story is the source of most of the tags.





	A Story to Tell

Jared woke up just after nine on Sunday, feeling insanely energized even by his usual exuberant standards. He hadn't had as much trouble falling asleep as he'd thought he would and, to his relief, his dreams hadn't lead to an unsatisfying mess on the sheets. They hadn't been overtly sexual at all, actually; he and Jensen had been flying around having adventures with friendly dragons who showed them exotic lands. The symbolism was definitely there, but it was pleasant background to the vistas they'd been exploring together.

Jensen was snoring away on his back. Jared got out of bed carefully and hit the bathroom. Oral hygiene had been tragically neglected the night before, so he flossed and brushed after carefully washing his face and slapping on some moisturizer. Bodily fluids, worn on the outside, could be so drying to the skin. Jared smiled at the memories.

Jensen was still asleep when Jared finished abluting, so Jared left him a note explaining that he was walking the dogs. He threw on shorts and a T-shirt, slipped on a pair of flip-flops, grabbed his phone and he and Cardy dragged Zucchini out for outdoor fun.

He called Misha first.

"How'd it go?" Misha asked. There were noises in the background which suggested that Misha was feeding chickens. 

"Oh, my god, it was incredible," Jared gushed. "He's just...well, not perfect, but as near as I can tell we have the same basic values."

"Anything else?"

"Oh, yeah. A lot else. He's got baggage, Misha, but I think it's like me-level baggage."

"You shared stories, then?"

"Me more than him, but yeah."

"You tell him about your so-called virginity?"

"Yeah, and it was cool. He kind of mocked me. But in a nice way!" Jared made sure to tell Misha. "I don't think he has the same definition of virginity as I do."

"Most people don't," Misha said. "There are so many ways to get sexy with people and you've at least tried a fair number of them. Just because you haven't done a couple of the ones we, as a society, have arbitrarily decided are somehow bigger than anything else...." Misha trailed off. This was well-covered ground between the two of them.

"Anyway, he didn't seem to consider me a virgin and anyway, he wasn't weird about it. I got the impression he might be looking forward to...introducing me to some things, but I don't think he would've cared if I was the most experienced sub in Greater Atlanta. Anyway, he liked it when I taught him how to play better pool, so maybe it kind of works both ways."

"Sounds good," Misha said.

"And he was really sweet about checking in...well, let's just say I think we're sexually compatible."

"I'm glad," Misha said. 

"How about you? How's it going with Vicki?"

Misha sighed. "I told her about being a switch."

"Wow. How'd that go?"

"Not great, not terrible. She says she has absolutely no submissive impulses herself but that she likes threesomes so maybe we could work something out."

"Do you think that would work?"

"Not sure. It's worth pursuing, though, and it's good to have that as an option."

"Keep me updated. I gotta go; I know Jensen's free today but he's got a crazy lawyer schedule and I gotta make soup while I've got fresh ingredients."

"Go forth and enjoy the day, my son," Misha intoned before disconnecting.

Jared smiled, then called Ms. Griffin.

"Jared," she said warmly. "I got your mass text on Friday; thanks for letting including me on that. How are you doing?"

"Really well, ma'am," Jared said. "I wanted to follow up personally to thank you for sending Misha over with the evaluation box."

"You're welcome. I hope he told you that I only sent the box over because I was worried you get bored and I wanted you to be able to do something professional if you felt inclined."

"He was clear on that. And it was a good call," Jared said. "I had some fun with it yesterday. And with the DVDs," he added. Not that he'd really watched them, but the pilot had been a good backdrop to...well, all kinds of really interesting things.

"Good, good," she said. "I haven't gotten the official report from Sheppard Associates yet, but I'm happy to hear that things went as well as could be expected as far as you're concerned."

"Ms. Wilson wrote a very nice reconciliation letter. Everyone signed it personally."

"I know; they gave me a copy for your file. They really like you, Jared. We all do."

"Thanks," Jared said, trying not to get too choked up. It wasn't like he didn't know he was good at his job, but getting reassurance never hurt.

"Is there anything else you need?"

"No, ma'am, I'm fine. I'll be back on Wednesday, no problems there."

"Good. Everyone can't wait to spoil you rotten."

"They already have," Jared said. They exchanged a few more pleasantries before disconnecting.

Jared and the dogs returned to the apartment to find Jensen up and making coffee. As soon as Jared walked through the door, Jensen walked up to him and drew him into a hug.

"Nice walk?" Jensen asked, voice muffled slightly as he pressed his face against Jared shoulder. Jared returned the hug, enjoying the physical reconnection.

"Yeah. Nice sleep?"

"The best. You? Not too uncomfortable?"

"Surprisingly, no. And I woke up with excess energy."

"Nice," Jensen muttered. "Me, not so much."

"You okay?" Jared asked, pulling away, resting his hands loosely on Jensen's upper arms, wanting to maintain contact but also wanting to be able to see Jensen's face.

"Basically. Just not a morning person. Coffee will make things better."

"Good." Jared paused awkwardly. "Um, you want to sit down while it finishes brewing?"

Jensen nodded and they settled on the couch.

"You feeling okay about what we did last night?" Jensen asked quietly.

"Yeah. Really good, in fact."

"I was worried I crossed a line or two."

Jared nodded. Jensen had already expressed conflict over his own desires and while it had worked out in the moment, Jared could totally understand Jensen being concerned in the light of day.

"I never wanted to be anyone's possession," Jared said carefully, trying to frame his words in a way that was both true to how he felt but that wouldn't alarm Jensen too much.

Jensen looked anxious. "I don't want to own anyone, despite all that shit I said," he told Jared.

"You told me you sometimes say things during sex that you think are maybe not so all right. And I told you I know the difference between what people say and feel during sex and how they feel the rest of the time."

"Yeah," Jensen said. "It's just...I like dating independent subs and a lot of them, for totally understandable reasons, are absolutely not down for the kinds of things I did and said last night. Or, flipping the coin, see me like that and expect me to be like that all the time. But you don't want that."

"No," Jared agreed. "I was kind of surprised by how I responded to your being so possessive in the bedroom. Pleasantly surprised," he added. He figured Jensen had gotten that message, but he wanted to reinforce it. It sounded like Jensen had been caught in a bind in several relationships.

"Good," Jensen said and Jared got the feeling it was just something Jensen said because he didn't know what else to say.

"I want to be my own man leading my own life," Jared tried to explain. "But for sex, I want to be my partner's. Yours."

"Good," Jensen said again. Jared sighed. He wasn't sure how much of what he was saying was getting through. Fortunately, the coffee was ready and maybe that would help matters. He quickly got a couple of mugs and Jensen sighed appreciatively when Jared handed him one of them.

"I just...this is moving kind of fast," Jensen said. "And I feel like I should put on the brakes, be responsible. But I really don't want to." Jensen took a sip of his coffee. "You're so open, Jared Padalecki, and you're making me feel something I haven't felt in years."

"What's that?" Jared asked.

Jensen looked up from his coffee to meet Jared's eyes. "Optimism," he said simply. 

"Oh," Jared said. He certainly hadn't been expecting a declaration of undying love and wouldn't have known what to with that if it had happened. But finding out that he was feeding Jensen's dormant sense of optimism...that was better. It made him feel proud and happy.

"And I'd like to be just as open with you as you're being with me, but...well, it's hard."

"Dom thing?"

"Maybe," Jensen shrugged. "Or maybe it's a me thing. There's so much we haven't talked about."

"True," Jared agreed. They'd talked a lot, but there was only so much they'd managed to cover in the relatively short time they'd actually known each other beyond agreeable nods in the hallway.

"What...how do you want to start?" Jared finally asked. For all that Jensen wanted to talk, he didn't seem to have much in the way of follow-through. Jared didn't know what that meant. Shyness? Domly reticence? He figured he'd better get used to it.

"Why don't you tell me a story?" Jensen suggested.

"What kind of story?" Jared was pretty sure he knew, but he had to draw Jensen out somehow. "The time I won the baking competition? The time Chad helped me ditch a date?"

"Not that kind of story at all, although the first sounds intriguing and I'm guessing the second has great entertainment potential. Something more personal."

"More personal than my secret recipe for cardamom and zucchini bread?"

"Cardamom...oh, so that's how the dogs got their names."

"Sort of. It's more involved than that."

"And it's a lovely tale, I'm sure," Jensen said. "But I'm thinking more about.... Let's see. You told me you've tried playing with your ass but never managed to top yourself. How far did you actually get?"

"Oh, god, that," Jared said. It would be embarrassing, talking about his masturbatory habits with Jensen. Personal. Revealing. And the mere thought was arousing.

"Hey, if you don't want to talk about it...." Jensen offered an out. Like he'd been doing all along.

"No, no, I'll tell. I just...maybe it'll help to set the stage."

"All the background you need," Jensen said pleasantly. "As long as it doesn't go back much before junior high."

"No, I mean that more literally. Help me move my furniture back."

Jensen raised an eyebrow but complied, moving over to pick up the cushions and pillows scattered in front of the wall of windows. Jared took them from him, returning them to their usual homes.

"As I recall, those two wing chairs flanking the TV go by the window," Jensen said. Jared nodded. They'd sat in those chairs, using the matching ottoman as a table, when Jared had plied Jensen with apps and Jensen's own beer.

With minimal fuss, everything ended up back in its rightful place. Jared indicated that Jensen should sit, and he did, turning to look back at Jared, still standing in the main part of the living room, away from the view.

"Okay, I've moved your furniture. Since you already gave me pizza, does this mean that I get a story?"

"Yeah, yeah, the story. Look, why don't you just admire the view and I'll tell you from here?" Jared moved until he was standing just a couple of feet behind Jensen. He was pretty sure that Jensen was just being deferential, would rather have been looking at him while he told his story, any story, because Jensen seems to like looking at Jared. Examining him.

Jared shakes himself free from that thought. Story. Right. Story to tell Jensen. About what he's done, or at least tried to do, with his own ass.

"Okay, so I don't know when I started touching my own ass for fun, but it was definitely before junior high," Jared started. "I mean, obviously I touched my ass a lot, with paper, with washcloths, and so on. At some point, I must've been around eleven or so, I started to notice that sometimes it felt kinda good. Especially in the shower, right after I'd cleaned up. I'd sort of...run my finger around the edge, thinking, 'Oh, hey, that's clean now.' And then it'd be like, 'It feels nice when it's clean'."

Jared paused. Jensen was still looking out the window, not saying anything, although he'd leaned forward, as though Jared were sitting next to him and Jensen wanted him to see that he was paying attention. Jared honestly wasn't sure if Jensen's not looking at him was making this easier or harder.

"So, that's what I did for years, sometimes after I took a shower and I'd be in bed by myself. At some point, I realized that one day, I'd have a dom who'd probably want to touch me there. Penetrate me."

He paused, but Jensen didn't fill his silence, so he continued.

"I think it wasn't until I was fifteen or so that I tried putting a finger in. I liked it. I got some lotion and sank my finger in and touched myself...my cock, I mean, and that was it, I went off almost immediately. If I ever had trouble getting there, I'd do that, slip in a finger and I'd be gone. And I hadn't even found my prostate yet, although I knew it was in there somewhere."

Jared thought about what to say next. How much did he need to tell Jensen about all the times he'd fingered himself? The routines he'd settled into? Routines he never really pushed further, because they worked, they made him feel so good.

"I went through that period you go through, when I was struggling with being a sub. You know, learning the history, seeing how people treated me once it was obvious what I was. I never hated being a sub, but it was, is, hard not to be resentful about the inequality you get in life just because of what you like to do in private.

"And I realized that I felt most submissive when I had my own finger in me. I couldn't stop myself from imagining that it was someone else's finger. But I didn't know whose. I didn't even know if it was a man or a woman. And then I'd start thinking of things I'd learned in history class, things that appalled me...except when I had a hard-on and my own finger up my ass.

"You know how subs used to have to approach doms. All those formal, elaborate, degrading customs. Vile, to my thinking then and now. Except...I'd be horny and fingering myself and imagine that I was doing that to show my submission to a specific dom, someone I'd chosen to submit to.

"It was really confusing and it was around the same time I started dating. My mom would set me up with these doms who were not anyone I'd ever want to submit to; I barely wanted to spend time with them. I was starting to think maybe there'd be a way for me to go to college after all, have a career. And so I suppressed all of that. Kept my hands off my ass because I couldn't afford to let myself feel that submissive, even in fantasy."

Jared folded his arms across his chest without realizing what he was doing. "I got through college. Got the job, bought this place. And started thinking about my fantasies and what I wanted from doms. From sex. And I decided that I'd proved that, when it came to it, I'd proven my worth. I'm just as good as any dom in the workplace. By then I was twenty-four and I was building equity in a decent piece of property. So I started thinking about all the things I hadn't let myself think about before. Fantasies that maybe wouldn't be so dangerous and distracting."

Jensen was still leaning forward in his chair and, even not being able to see him fully, Jared knew he had the dom's complete attention.

"So I got some toys. Beads. Plugs. Dildos. I set aside a weekend. Took the dogs out on a Saturday morning, brought 'em back in, prepped myself and put in a plug. A pretty big one. The plan was to keep it in all weekend and just...enjoy the feeling."

Jensen made a small noise at that and Jared noticed that his hands were clenching at the arms of his chair.

"How long did you last?" Jensen asked, his voice low, strained. Like he didn't want to interrupt Jared but had to know.

"Not long," Jared confessed. "I was going to do some baking, but I was too distracted. I managed to load the washer and do the vacuuming...barely. All I could think about was the plug inside me, how full and good it felt. How hard I was. So I came over here," Jared moved to the chair next to Jensen's. "I figured I could at least watch the view, you know?"

Jared sat down, carefully looking at the view, not Jensen.

"Only...it didn't feel right, sitting in a chair like that. So I knelt on the floor next to the chair." Jared recreated his position, kneeling next to Jensen's chair, still not looking at the dom.

"That felt better. Just kneeling on the floor, hard and leaking. Eventually, my knees got tired, so I shifted to my side." Again, Jared followed his own words, shifting over to put some weight on his left leg, leaning the side of his torso against the chair. "I rested my head on the arm of the chair."

Jensen got what he was doing and moved his own hand off the chair's arm, sliding slightly to the left to give Jared space. Jared rested his cheek on the chair, the arm still warm from where Jensen had been using it.

"It felt wonderful for a minute or two, but then I felt so sad. Because there was no one in the chair. The plug was there because I'd chosen to put it there, and that part was good, but there was no one to care that I had done that. I wasn't doing it for anyone else and doing it just for myself wasn't enough. Without someone to share it with.... Well, it barely meant anything. Next to nothing at all. The fact that, physically, it felt good just wasn't enough.

"I got up, took the plug out, washed it off and put it away. I haven't taken it out since."

Jared stopped talking and silence stretched between them before Jensen finally broke it.

"May I touch you?" Jared looked up. Jensen was still staring out the window, but Jared got the feeling he wasn't really looking at the view. He looked lost in his thoughts, and they weren't necessarily happy thoughts, Jared thought.

"Yes. Please," Jared said, but he wasn't begging to signal submission. He wanted Jensen to touch him, to want to touch him.

Slowly, Jensen lowered his hand to Jared's head and began stroking his hair. It felt wonderful, draining the tension that Jared had felt building during his long speech.

"That must have been the loneliest feeling," Jensen said quietly. Jared nodded under Jensen's hand. "No wonder you put it away. No wonder you haven't looked at it since."

"I...can't. Well, couldn't."

And then, finally, Jensen was looking directly down into Jared's face, his expression mirroring the loneliness and sorrow Jared had been speaking of.

"Couldn't?"

"I could. See myself getting it out again. Getting ready for it. Putting it in. So I could sit right here, at your feet, wearing it and knowing that it was for you. For me. For us both."

"Come here, Jared Padalecki," Jensen said, pulling Jared to his feet and then settling him in his lap. It should've been awkward, two large men sharing a single chair, but it wasn't. Jensen knew how to hold someone on his lap. How to hold _Jared_ on his lap.

Knew how to soothe him, holding him close, stroking his back. 

"It's nice, isn't it?" Jensen asked. "Good to have someone to talk to, someone to share these things with."

"All these things," Jared averred.

"Thank you," Jensen said. "For telling me what it's been like for you, for suggesting that this is something you're thinking of sharing with me. You honor me, Jared."

They sat there, Jensen holding Jared, for a long time. And Jared didn't argue with Jensen, even though he felt like the one who was truly being honored.

**Author's Note:**

> I found several recipes for zucchini cardamom bread online. I tried one, which reminded me of why I don't bake anymore (wrong temperament and cleanup is a pain in ass) and turned out kind of terrible. I blame the specific recipe more than the general concept of seasoning zucchini with cardamom. Jared's, though, was fucking awesome and he won that baking competition fair and square.


End file.
